Over the last two nights we’ve experienced three hours dedicated to sending 75% of the people appearing home. That is right, in a new twist this year, we get to go back to pretty much the way things were done the first three seasons! For the past four seasons the judges have pared things down to twenty-four and then viewers voted on equally split sets of men and women. This was done to ensure an equal split in the Top 12 Finalists. This year the system works like this: there are three sets of twelve, and from that set the top male and female vote-getters go through along with the next top person whether male or female.

If you have done your advanced math, you will realize that accounts for nine of twelve finalists. In another move that goes back to a sort of hybrid of the early seasons, there is a Wild Card round that will decide the final three spots. But this year there is no fan control – the Wild Cards are decided by the judges. It is a rather odd system in that viewers get control earlier but have fewer picks in the finalists. I’m sure that once we see how they round out I’ll have more to say about that …

One thing I’ll be doing differently from here on out is looking at the performance show and results show separately but in the same article. So you will get my raw thoughts on the performances before I know how the results turned out. So if you are just wondering about the winners, scroll on down to the section titled Results Show.

As for the content of the show, you might be asking “I thought at this point they only sang snippits of a single song”? You would be correct. And so while doing more math you also surmised that based on less than one and a half minutes of singing per contestant, that would amount to about 18 minutes of singing for all twelve contestants! What the heck did they do for the remaining TWO HOURS AND FORTY-TWO MINUTES!?!?! Well, if you have watched more than one episode you already know. There is an ‘up close and personal’ video with each contestant, then some singing, then the judges chiming in for a few minutes and then the follow-up with Ryan and the singer’s family or friends. Then the final wrap-up that takes it past the two hour mark on day one. Oh, and a ton of commercials to fill out the rest!

Day two is ‘judgement day’. What that means is that we can expect to see all of the performances again with folks separated into groups slowly and weeded out at a pace that makes a golf match look like a high-speed chase. As for the structure, I’m not sure – but will update it after the show airs.

I know many folks have different times they tune in – some are there from the start, others from the beginning of viewer voting, still others for the Top 12, and yet others wait until the final few are left. Of course, more and more don’t watch at all … and if you are one of them, I assume you are reading this out of morbid curiosity. That is fine – there are many things I choose to spend two minutes reading rather than three hours watching (such as every awards show!). Assuming that you are someone who skips the prelims and only joins in when you get some say in the process, let me just say:

WELCOME TO THE BEST AND MOST TALENTED SEASON OF AMERICAN IDOL EVAR!!!!!!1111111one

Yeah, or if you read my article last week you already know how I feel about this crew …

PERFORMANCE SHOW

Anyway, if you dropped in during the singing part of two-thirds of the folks last night, you probably went out and checked your calendar … or maybe checked the TV Guide to confirm that this was indeed ‘new’ and not a rerun of an earlier show. Because most of what was done looked like auditions from folks who didn’t make it to ‘Hollywood Week’. Honestly there was some pretty bad stuff in terms of vocals, performances, song choices, and so on. Here is a quick run-down of what happened (note that these come from after the first night and therefore don’t reflect what happened in the results show):

Jackie Tohn – “A Little Less Conversation”
Wearing something that looked like it was out of a Pat Benetar video (something the judges noted) and singing with a strange raspiness that was supposed to simulate emotion, Jackie didn’t get things off to a great start.

Ricky Braddy – “A Song For You”
He had an interesting ‘theme’ with ‘The Braddy Bunch’ – my kids actually got that one from recent TVLand viewing – but that was the most interesting thing about Ricky. I wondered why we hadn’t seen him before … now I know. He sings fairly well but it utterly forgettable … in fact I’ve already forgotten the details since scribbling notes during the show.

Alexis Grace — “I Never Loved a Man”
We have liked Alexis since day one because of her look and personality. It was a bit uncomfortable (with the kids) to have them replaying all the bits about the judges telling her to ‘nasty it up’ and Kara saying to ‘make love to her fiance’ (sexual references are becoming a bit of a theme with her it seems … ). The judges liked her performance, which was odd because none of us thought it was all that great – although at this point it was clearly the best so far. Felt like one of those scripted moments where they were pushing someone they liked in spite of a middling performance. We are still hoping she makes it, but not sure she deserves it at this point.

Brent Keith — “Hicktown”
Another person I don’t remember singing a song I had never heard in a genre I don’t really like. And doing it in a completely cardboard & vanilla fashion that ensures that nobody else will remember him. Note to performers: NOT singing off-key and NOT bouncing around like an idiot are not the same as singing WELL and having GOOD stage presence.

Stevie Wright — “You Belong With Me” by Taylor Swift
Funny story – last week was the ‘Intermediate School Talent Show’ (Intermediate School in our town has 5th and 6th grades), and out of 50 performances (yes, over 3 hours long!) there were at least 8 that were singing or dancing to a Taylor Swift sing. By the end of Stevie Wright’s performance my kids were postulating who would be suing her for butchering the song, and that list included the kids who did it better at their Talent Show …

Anoop Desai — “Angel of Mine”
Anoop is another one we have liked, and did a decent job on a sweet song. Problem is, the best thing about him is the fun factor which is pretty much absent here. He is still one of the highlights of a pretty lousy night.

Casey Carlson — “Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic”
This would have been more notable for being terrible if it wasn’t for Stevie Wright winning the ‘bottom feeder of the night’ award. Paula said that she needed to work on the odd facial expressions … Simon said that the winking was the LEAST of her problems. Yeah, that about sums it up

Michael Sarver — “I Don’t Want To Be”
This is the guy who works as a roughneck on an oil rig (5th most dangerous job as we have been told ad nauseum) and was on the second tier of coverage minutes below the ‘drama queens’ … yet during Hollywood we we didn’t see enough to expect him to end up in a sing-off. Tonight we saw why he almost didn’t make it and won’t make the finals. His singing was average and the performance wasn’t very good. He is still a cool guy you’d like to hang out with … which is where he’ll be soon.

Ann Marie Boskovitch — “Natural Woman”
I found it odd during the audition that the judges sent her out to remake herself … but you can see why after tonight. She is vaguely pretty with a voice that hits notes and keaves no impression whatsoever. She has some to this point by simply NOT screwing up. Tonight her one mistake was picking a song that is locked in the early 70’s and singing it as if she should be dressed up like Carole King on the cover of Tapestry … and that mistake will stop her dead tonight.

Stephen Fowler — “Rock With You” by Michael Jackson
He is another one who has been pushed by the judges despite a string of mistakes … but it is clear he has potential. In yet another bewildering song choice mistake, he takes another song locked to a person and an era and tries to sing it more or less straight. It was not good at all, dawg. Wot?

Tatiana Del Toro — “Saving All My Love For You”
We really dislike this girl – but of course that is how we are SUPPOSED to feel, as if it wasn’t hammered home by the fact that she was in ~50% of all Hollywood Week coverage. But as much as everyone wants to hate her – she can actually sing pretty well. She wasn’t perfect by any stretch, and the performance and general behavior made her seem like she was sedated, but definitely one of the top two female performances of the night (tough call, eh?).

Danny Gokay — “Hero” by Mariah Carey
Danny has been set up as a sentimental favorite, pushed hard throughout, and is right at the front of that ‘second tier’ of coverage (right behind the crazies). He actually sings pretty well and has a good personality, and with our own family-focus we are suckers for his story. He comes through with the best performance of the night, performing an arrangement that didn’t take him out of his range and highlighted his strangths. Saying ‘best of night’ isn’t such high praise with this crew … but he certainly deserves a place in the finals.

My predictions based on the performances?
– Top Male – Danny Gokay
– Top Female – Alexis Grace
– Other Finalist – Anoop Desai
– Wildcard Entry – Tatiana Del Toro (as I said, this comes later).

I will leave these untouched and continue after the results show.

A bit of general commentary.
– The judges were actually pretty decent tonight, with pointed criticism and a lack of fluffy superlatives. Randy still spewed way too many ‘dawgs’ and said ‘wot’ without context enough that it was more like a tic, and Paula bordered on incoherent a couple of times, but overall the judges were pretty good … and in general I agreed with what they were saying.
– What is up with Kara and all the double-entendre? It was not subtle, and provided my kids more than a couple of chuckles ‘hehe … under the table … hehe’. Not complaining, as it is an interesting contrast with the back & forth between Simon and Ryan … it is just interesting how the judge introduced as a ‘serious songwriter’ has quickly been played for her youth and good looks and now as some sort of latent horn-dog … or is that dawg. Tune in next week to hear Kara discussing how Ann Marie Boskovich said “I just sat on the hard part” …
– I wondered with this elimination format if there might me issues with how the groups were divided. However, I thought tonight’s list looked talent-rich … until I saw them. I guess, or rather hope, that the next two weeks are better, but still worry about the balance. I guess that is why they have the Wild Card slots, but with the system it is more about allowing judge favorites rather than helping the balance.
– I don’t generally study the Billboard Hot 100, but find it hard to believe that THOSE were the best and most representative songs they could come up with. I mean, every season has a Billboard night, these are popular songs from all eras, they had to be looking the charts over to see what songs they might like to sing. It is pretty sorry indeed – I have complained about the producers foisting these old fogey artists like Dolly Parton and Neil Diamond on the kids, but this was their own choice …

RESULTS SHOW

So now the results are in, and before I get to them I’ll just talk about the show a bit. Again, with an hour to fill out (well, about 40 minutes after commercials) and only a few minutes of actual content there was sure to be loads of filler. Here is how it went:
– We started off with a look at ‘how they got here’. Which wasn’t enough to tell us anything of substance.
– Then we got into a whole sequence of double entendre with Simon and Randy saying ‘it is a PG show’. It was poorly scripted and executed attempt at camaraderie between the judges.
– Next came a ‘group sing’, with some song I swear has been in a Ford commercial because I kept thinking they should just roll a Focus on to the stage. The singing was very average and the overall production was subpar and worse than I’ve seen from local community theater acts.
– Then they dumped a couple of people unceremoniously, followed by the first entry into the top 12.
– Next was an extended spot on the new Disney ‘Idol Experience’ that recently opened. I had heard good things about the Carrie Underwood / David Cook duet, and the 30 seconds we saw was better than anything that has happened so far this season.
– Then some more eliminations, followed by a dramatic one-on-one between two favorites – Anoop and the Roughneck. I’ll tell you who advanced in a minute.
– Then we were ‘treated’ to our old friends Carly Smithson and Michael Johns butchering the 60’s classic ‘The Letter’. They reminded us why they didn’t make it through despite beign pushed very hard by the judges and producers. Maybe they were there to make this year’s folks look good by contrast. It worked.
– Finally there was one more elimination, this time taking out three of the final five in one fell swoop.
– That only left two people and one spot … and ten minutes to build the drama.

Before the announcement of each person’s fate one of more judge would chime in about how they felt about last night for that person. After each person was named to the top 12 they sang their song again. All in all the hour went by fairly quickly without feeling too excruciating.

The first person named to the Top 12 was Alexis Grace, who proceeded to sing better than last night and looked relaxed and performed pretty well. She was announced after Casey Carlson and Stephen Fowler were unceremoniously booted.

The two people competing for a spot mid-show were Anoop Desai and Michael Sarver. To our suprise it was Michael Sarver who was chosen, apparently by a slim margin over Anoop. I didn’t see that coming – I would have assumed it would be Braddy or Tatiana competing for the other slot. Braddy had joined Jackie Tohn at being dumped before the Anoop / Sarver showdown, which provided the only real drama of the night (despite Tatiana’s best efforts).

Just before they were brought out Ryan had the other three left – Stevie Wright, Brent Keith and Ann Marie Boskovich – were told to stand up … then go home. It was a pretty summary dismissal, and felt like ‘hey, we’re running long, just get those other three out of here’.

The final pair was Tatiana and Danny Gokay … and the feeling was less suspense than fear. Tatiana is a definite ‘VoteForTheWorst’ favorite, which I respect and have supported in the past … but she just drives us nuts and we want her gone. Well, we got our wish as (unsurprisingly, really) Danny Gokay rounded out the first three entries to the Top 12.

So the first entries into the Top 12:
– Alexis Grace – obviously the highest female vote getter
– Michael Sarver – apparently the ‘other’ highest vote getter
– Danny Gokay – highest male vote getter

I got two out of three, and apparently was only 20,000 votes from getting all three right (out of 24 million votes, 20,000 is 0.08%!). But I got the easy ones right …

The show itself was fairly predictable and suffered some lousy production values as seen on the performance show, which is odd for a show that is such a money machine. There was loads of self-promotion as always, and very little drama. Tatiana really tried to push the drama, as though her hysterics might pull judge sympathy and win her a Wild Card spot. We can only hop not … I was really annoyed as Stevie Wright, who at 16 had done a good job taking the judge’s lambasting after her performance, was left to console Tatiana as Danny sang. This was definitely not something worth three hours of viewing – unless you are doing it as a ‘family viewing experience’, in which case it is always fun.

Up next week? Even more people I can barely remember, the one guy who my kids think has cool emo hair, and that Nick / Normund dude. Should be … well, about as good as this week. See you then!

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