Ni no Super Bowl: Wrath of the Commercials

SUPERBOWLSo another Super Bowl has come and gone. I enjoy watching the Super Bowl every year; it’s like a national holiday nowadays. It’s usually a pretty good game, even if I don’t care about the teams. And sometimes the commercials are fun to watch, too. But I just like commercials in general. Yeah, I know, I’m crazy like that. Sometimes I think the commercials are better than the actual TV show! So as I like to do every year, here’s a play by play report of the commercials at this year’s Super Bowl that caught my eye.

Honestly, though, while I did watch the Super Bowl, I would’ve much rather have been playing Ni no Kuni: Wrath of the White Witch, a new PS3 RPG I got last week. I tell you what; I’m really enjoying that game. I haven’t been this into an RPG since Tales of Legenda. And before that, Final Fantasy 9. That’s how much I like it. The game just really clicks with me. It’s a good example of the kinds of games I like. I feel sorry for the people who didn’t like the game that they couldn’t enjoy it as much as I am. But I can play Ni no Kuni anytime, and the Super Bowl is once a year. Of course, to be honest, during most of the actual football game, I was reading my new Hyrule Historia book that I just got. I’ll be reviewing that one later.  Didn’t even watch the halftime show either.  I just went potty and folded laundry.

And I can’t forget my other Super Bowl tradition: watching the Puppy Bowl on Animal Planet. This was such a clever idea they had. Animal Planet knew they wouldn’t have many viewers, so every year they just throw some puppies in a little football stadium play area, and just let them romp around while they film it. It’s so stupid but I love it anyway. Every year they add a little something different, and this one they did hedgehog cheerleaders. Of course you always have your hamster blimp, adult dog tailgaters, and the kitten half time show. This year one of the puppies was a chow/lab mix that looked JUST LIKE my dog Venus. She’s a lab/chow mix, too. The puppy on the show, Magnolia, even acted like my dog Venus: just lying around not doing anything. Did anyone else watch the Puppy Bowl, too? At the very least, it’s fun for kids to watch.

OK, onto the commercials. I noticed during the pre-game stuff, there were LOTS of Pizza Hut commercials. I guess they wanted you to order pizza during the game. That’s the other thing I like about the Super Bowl is eating all the yummy snacks. This year I had little sausage smokies, deli roll tortillas, veggies and dip, and fresh strawberries. What snacks did you eat during the game?

I have to also say a lot of the commercials didn’t interest me because I don’t plan on buying their products. I didn’t pay attention to any of the car commercials because I’ve been blind in my left eye since birth and can’t drive, so I’m not in the market for a car. I’m also very boring and don’t like drinking beer, so most of those ads passed me by, too. And why must the NFL advertise themselves during the Super Bowl? I just don’t understand that.

I did like the M&M ad where the red one was singing about not wanting to be eaten, but then, I always like the M&M commercials, even if I don’t eat candy much (see, I’m boring). Did you know the current M&M ads are done by the same folks who brought us the California Raisins and The Noid? Did I just age myself there?

Some of the commercials were downright gross. Like the Go Daddy one where the nerd and the lady were kissing. Blech! At least they told what Go Daddy does. A while back, they didn’t do that so I wondered what the Web site did, but was afraid to go to it because the ads made it look like a place I shouldn’t go to! Speaking of gross commercials, there was also that Calvin Klein underwear ad. I doubt a pair of expensive underwear would make me more sexy, especially when I’ll end up covering it with my favorite pair of lounge pants that have green 1up mushrooms all over them. That’s totally not sexy, but I don’t care.

Pepsi just had that wild teen party ad, but at least it made more sense than the first Coke ad. The other Coca-Cola ad let you vote to find out who would win the race to get to the Coke in the desert. It was between some camel guys, cowboys, bikers, and a bus full of Vegas showgirls. I would vote for the Vegas ladies because they were driving a pink bus, and I thought that was cool. I don’t drink sodas very much either. I usually just drink water. See, told you I was boring.

Lots of movie previews, too. Most didn’t interest me, but I might look into that Disney Oz one a little bit more. And the new Star Trek and Iron Man movies will be fun mindless summer flicks I’m sure. Snack food giant Frito-Lay also had a couple of funny ads. One had a goat and the other had a daddy dressing up in a dress and playing with her daughter so he could have a bag of Doritos. Oreos also had an ad where people were arguing quietly in a library over what was better, the cookie or the cream part. I would have to say the cookie part is better, because I don’t like the cream part at all. Which is why I don’t eat Oreos either. Except all crunched up in a Dairy Queen Blizzard.

With all the beer ads, I’m surprised that they actually did a milk commercial during the Super Bowl. It had some guy running past all this dangerous stuff to get to the milk truck to get milk for his kids. Fast food places had their share of ads, too. Subway sure does like to still use that Jared guy after all these years. And I couldn’t tell what that commercial was with all those senior adults going out on the town being wild and party animals. Until at the end when they ate tacos. But that was kind of gross and didn’t want to make me eat Taco Bell.

I did like the Sketchers shoe commercial where the guy was running faster than the cheetah. When you were a kid and got a new pair of shoes, did you think you could instantly run faster once you put them on? Speaking of kids, the talking E-Trade baby was back. Can’t go wrong with talking babies. There was also an Axe body wash commercial with a contest to send winners into space. Frankly, I really don’t want to go to outer space. Oh yeah, there was one car commercial I do remember because it had a scary robot lady in it.

The only beer commercial I really remember was the one with the baby Clydesdale horse. That one made my mom cry. They also had some other beer ad with voodoo dolls and a lucky chair that they showed a few times. Time Warner had an ad using The Walking Dead; that sure is a popular show now. The Tide ad with the Joe Montana stain was kind of funny. Too bad not everyone could see the local ads, because fast food chain Jack in the Box’s ad with a “Hot Mess” song was pretty funny. I hate their food, but they do have funny ads.

And that’s all the commercials I can remember. I really wasn’t impressed with any of them, though. What were your favorite ads? Let me know in the comments section! Later! –Cary

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